Battered, bruised and bullet-ridden, a forlorn Brown has opened his heart to Guardian readers saying he could "walk away from office" tomorrow. So why doesn't he?
Admitting he's been "hurt" by personal attacks on him, redacted Brown plays the sympathy card but in politics, crocodile tears rarely work. The public can see through the sham.
There are three kinds of people in this world. Those who say they're going to do something, those who just get on with it. And those who are so bunkered, blinkered and deluded with their own self-serving sense of importance they can never see the truth even if it jumps up and slaps them around the face.
So into which category does the struggling Supreme Leader fit?
In an effort to capture the media high ground, Brown today has a stab at making his case in the Guardian, the very newspaper which not so long ago came out and called for his head.
Skilfully designed to keep their man in the public spotlight and sway opinion polls, Brown actually argues the case for stepping down rather than stepping up to the mark.
Casting coups to the wind, Brown admitted flaws in his leadership, particularly how he presented himself to the public.
"I'm not as great a presenter of information or communicator as I would like to be," said YouTube Brown, adding that he is not skilled at political manoeuvring. But that's a joke. It's the one skill he does have which will be his political downfall.
At a stroke this gets to the heart of the problem facing the Party. Voters are turning to the Tories exactly because Silly Billy Brown is the leader of a fag-end government and a discredited New Labour brand with all the smug arrogance that comes with being in office for far too long.
Dismissing the recent coup attempt by Blairite ministers and backbenchers shows up a mind more interested in petty party politics rather than having the good of the country and the Party at heart.
The threat from the Blairites was a smokescreen and Team Brown know it. Without the overt support of their man Blair it could never succeed.
According to Oborne the deal has been struck between Cameron and Blair: Dave wouldn't stand in the way of Tony's quest to be EU president - if Tony promises to keep his nose out of Brown politics and give the Tories a clear run.
But the threat to the Brown camp is there. It is real. It comes from true Labour Party backbenchers who ducked out of the coup attempt in the misguided belief they could change both Brown and policy from within. Now reality could set in at September's Labour leaving Party conference.
Brown just doesn't get it and never will. He's stuck in the past. Way back to the days of John Smith. But times have changed and so too what is expected of a political leader in the new dawn of a very politically savvy public.
A political party needs someone at the front who's got a bit of personality, a bit of charisma and someone who's language connects with ordinary people.
Blair showed how it could be done. Obama followed and Cameron is having a stab at it. That's why heir-to-Blair Cameron will succeed where Brown never can.
How back-seat Brown must hate Dave's Blairish charm. Someone with the very qualities he despised in Blair now showing themselves in Cameron. Someone who has the very gift he so clearly lacks.
The danger comes when the language is exposed as a sham of empty hollow words, a shaman with a messianic message. Only fooling some of the people some of the time. For Brown, without trust, hope fades away, without charm, rhetoric bores the pants off people.
The real tragedy of Brown is it's all a con. Brown is personality driven. Bringing back Lordy Mandy, celebrity goats like Surrallan Sugar and now his own Campbell style spin doctor in the shape of suave Simon Lewis.
Amazingly the Mandy line is developed with gusto for Guardianistas. Apparently the Labour Party had "finally come round" to Mandelson, with Brown adding that he felt "there's a great affection for him now" (sic).
There's a "common purpose" (more sic) between Mandy and Billy no mates Brown apparently, oblivious to the harsh reality of life that Mandy is propping him up but only while it suits him.
When the price is right, he'll cast him off like an old sock.
Meanwhile the long-suffering public are left having to put up with all the clap-trap for months to come. Nothing but spin and hype in a phoney election war.
Revealing the three pronged election strategy - success in handling the economy, tackling MPs' expenses and nasty Tory cuts - all three claims are riddled with lies and deceit.
Sadly the poor prime minister said he found it hard to focus on strategic planning "as you have to deal with immediate events, like if a bank's going to go under". But isn't that what voters expect from a leader?
So that's it. A world-weary Brown. A prime minister who would rather hide away in the bunker, plotting how to wrong foot his opponents rather than deal with life's little irritants - the very irritants which have a real effect on real people in the real world.
Totally lacking the ability to inspire, Brown's tragedy is that you cannot teach an old dog news tricks. Just walking away with some dignity now would give him some respect. The Party and the country would breath a collective sigh of relief.
But will he do it? Will he heck. Busy, busy, busy plotting and penning political suicide notes as deluded Brown tries to get back in Guardian readers' good books.
Top picture: Guardian (redacted). Mid picture: Mail